Folks, we’re going to talk about Plainpotatoess. If you don’t know who he is, in a
mouthful of words, he is a particularly talented improvisational troll that worked
the neighborhoods of Baltimore and posted his work on social platforms. But this is
not really about him. Or what he did. Or whether it was good or bad. This concerns
the same thing we will always write about. The truth.

And here’s the truth that’s hiding in plain sight: Plainpotatoess was arrested last
Thursday right here in the ol’ USA for the crime of telling offensive jokes. He’s a
victim of people turned morally subjective and weak in virtually every regard. He’s
a victim of people who have been infantilized by counterfeit values and will wield
the force of law sooner than be publicly displayed as, well, the functional equivalent
of children.

I would describe a typical encounter with Plainpotatoess but no prose I could
muster would do it justice. So watch this reaction video to one of PP’s
“performances” featuring a shrieking tantruming woman-child.

Let’s go through this in some detail. What do we notice about the woman-child?

• She screams. LEAVE! LEAVE! PLEASE LEAVE! LEAVE! FUCKING LEAVE! And
  so on. This is what a six-year-old girl does: scream over and over and over
  again about what I want! And I will get what I want because the world
  revolves around me!
• She takes no concrete effective action whatsoever. Because action would require capacities she totally lacks. She cannot reason her way to the exact nature of the moral status of the situation. When she tries to articulate what exactly is wrong with the situation the best she can come up with is YOU MAKE US LOOK BAD! And without understanding the exact moral nature of the situation, she cannot conclude what responsive acts would be justified or unjustified. So she’s impotent.
• Now she can only resort to the acts that have always worked for her. She distorts and fabricates. You’re a TERRORIST! Does anyone else hear a six-year-old girl screaming fabricated allegations about a teasing brother? He HIT me! SPANK him! And to make sure mommy hears, she calls 911. (I posted a link to Jinx’s reaction video so you could see his spontaneous incredulity at the notion that Plainpotatoess is a “terrorist.”)

Folks, these are the objective qualities of a child. So it’s not surprising that Jinx
exclaims “It’s like he’s talking to a baby!” Yes. It’s exactly like that, Jinx.
Plainpotatoess doesn’t “make them look bad.” He reveals them for what they are.
There are certain questions that naturally arise from this. How does a population
come to be evacuated of the qualities of adulthood? What species of forces
infantilized this woman and so many others?

An infantilized population is guaranteed when that population comes of age in a
culture that seeks to remove every source of potential injury from society. Shall we
teach kids how to stand up to bullies or shall we run anti-bullying campaigns? Shall
we teach people self-defense or shall we advocate gun control? Shall we teach
young women how to stand up for themselves in a turbulent and confusing dating
culture or shall we enact Title IX kangaroo courts that remove the “bad man” from
campus at the slightest allegation? What is the message sent by all of this? Does an
adult need to know how to respond to and neutralize malefactors or does an adult
merely need to know how to call mommy when one is presented?

A morally ignorant infantilized population is guaranteed when the culture sends
messages that affirm the notion that a perceived injury is a real injury. This is why
political correctness is part madness. Not because there is anything wrong with
being polite. But because it sends the message that if anyone perceives that they’ve
been injured, their perception is ipso facto valid. So we’ve reduced moral reasoning
to this: we ask an infantilized populace how an action or a message made them feel.
And the woman-child answers: HE MADE ME LOOK BAD AND THAT HURT MY
FEELINGS, SO IT WAS WRONG! How wrong was it? IT MADE ME FEEL VERY BAD SO
IT WAS VERY WRONG!

So now let’s look at how it came to be that Plainpotatoess was charged. Because it
matters. It was a three-step process:

• STEP 1 – infantilized citizens of Baltimore complain to City Councilman Eric
  Costello. Because he made them “look bad.” And this hurt their feelings. And
  they want mommy to do something about it!
• STEP 2 – Costello reviews “more than three hours of footage” and concludes: “It’s not just that he’s making jokes. He’s making jokes about race, gender and religion.” Plainpotatoess has sinned at the sacred altar of political correctness! This is desecration! He must be punished!
• STEP 3 – So Costello looks for a crime to charge him with. He pores over the videos and “noticed in a lot of these videos he was being asked to leave and wasn’t doing it.” Ah ha! Criminal trespass and harassment!

Doesn’t this frighten you? It frightens me. Plainpotatoess was criminally charged
because he was making jokes about race, gender and religion. Costello literally
described this as the motivation to charge him. Let that sink in. Costello had no
problem being quoted in The Baltimore Sun as saying that the motivation for
charging Plainpotatoess was that he was that he dared joke about race, religion or
gender. It doesn’t even occur to Costello that selective prosecution is a bad thing. If
Allen Funt were filming an episode of Candid Camera on the streets of Baltimore
would he charged? Of course not! He might make the citizenry “look bad” but he at
least he wouldn’t make jokes about race or gender or religion! So he’s okay. But
Plainpotatoess is bad.

Moreover, think about this: for Plainpotatoess’ actions to amount to criminal
harassment they would have to “seriously annoy” or “alarm” the victim.
Plainpotatoess tells you that your breath stinks. Are you alarmed? Are you seriously
annoyed? He tells you that you’re bald, he tells you that you need dental work,
makes fun of your fingernails. Are you alarmed? Do you fear for your safety? Are
you seriously annoyed? And, if so, might I ask if you are capable of being annoyed
without being seriously annoyed? Of course you’re not! You’re a man-child! Or a
woman-child!

It’s time to grow up, people.